When you think about it, most popular comic books are pretty bizarre.
Seriously, a boy develops superhuman speed and strength after being bitten by a spider? A journalist by day is actually Superman, a crime fighting alien with the powers of flight, x ray vision, and super strength? Let’s also not kid ourselves and say Batman isn’t a detective in a bat costume who once tried to solve the mystery of whether Paul McCartney is dead or not (okay, they didn’t use Paul’s name in the comic, but the inspiration is obvious). Fortunately, none of these exceedingly silly origin stories matter in the grand scheme of our favorite characters. As audiences get older and increase their reverence for these classic heroes, comic book writers develop these flamboyant characters in ways that connect with the struggles their readers face. We don’t love Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy just because it’s Batman; we love those movies because Bruce Wayne’s battle for order in the chaotic Gotham City mirrors our desire for peace in an increasingly dangerous world.
Of course, this is not to say that writers have reconciled all the silliness in comic books over the past 70 years. For pinnacle examples of the most ridiculous ideas ever put to paper, check out the following ten comics listed below:
10: The Avengers On Late Night With David Letterman
Comic book writers sure do love their crazy crossovers, and we wish we could say that the The Avengers making an appearance on Late Night With David Letterman is the silliest crossover ever written.
Being that Letterman’s career as a late night TV host ended just last year, it now seems appropriate that he spent many of his final years sitting down with cast members of the modern Avengers movies.
9: The Life Of Pope John Paul II
Alright, The Life of Pope John Paul II may be a straight-forward biographical comic… but that’s why it’s so strange!
The fact that Marvel Comics – responsible for characters like Thor and Deadpool – found time to base a comic on a true story is bizarre when you think about it. Believe it or not, The Life of Pope John Paul II is not the only Marvel comic based on a religious figure: they also penned issues based on Mother Teresa and Saint Francis of Assisi.
8: Longshot Comics
No, we’re not talking about Marvel’s lesser-known X-Man named Longshot. We’re talking about Shane Simmon’s Longshot Comics, a comic book series about… dots.
That’s right, under the loose justification that the audience is viewing the action from a distance (or, as you might say, a longshot), Longshot Comics features everything from war stories to tales of domestic households through the simplest form of what could be called art. Could anyone have made Longshot Comics? Probably, but Simmon’s work likely set the stage for modern “artless” works like Dinosaur Comics.
7: Superman Meets The Quik Bunny
With a hero as powerful as the man of steel, one would think he’d pick an extraordinarily powerful companion to brave the dangerous situations he often finds himself in. Or, you know, he could team up with the Quik Bunny, that works too.
Do Superman and the Quik Bunny have a chocolate milk drinking contest? Is the Quik Bunny given a tall glass of delicious Nesquik to help calm his nerves? Find out the shocking answers in this special issue of Superman! (Spoilers, the answers are yes and yes).
6: Archie Meets The Punisher
The Punisher is a hyper violent vigilante who has no problem with torture and extortion to accomplish his goals. Archie is a teenager who can’t decide whether he likes Betty or Veronica. Obviously these two characters belong together.
This has to be the most ridiculous crossover comic ever written. Right? Riiiight?
5: Godzilla Vs. Charles Barkley
Somewhere out there is a venn diagram that shows the overlap between fans of basketball and giant monsters. Marketing executives saw it and concluded that Godzilla and Charles Barkley needed to be put in the same universe. That’s what we’re assuming, anyway, because… what is this!?
Between this and the fan-made Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden role-playing game from the late 2000s, there must be something about the famous basketball player that makes people want to put him in the most ridiculous situations imaginable. This is the only way we can reconcile seeing an actual panel in which Godzilla dons basketball shoes and attempts a slam dunk.
4: Arm-Fall-Off Boy
You know what Arm-Fall-Off Boy’s super power is? We know it’s hard, but take a wild guess.
Seriously, who thought having limbs that could fall off was a great idea for a super power? Fun fact: people in ancient times had powers similar to Arm-Fall-Off Boy, except by “powers” we mean “diseases” and by “fun” we mean “the complete opposite of fun.”
3: Matter-Eater Lad
Matter-Eater Lad is a superhero who is capable of eating anything, which we must begrudgingly admit is useful in spite of its ridiculousness.
Need a tunnel made as soon as possible? Have Matter-Eater Lad chew his way into the ground. Need a hole in a fence? Matter-Eater Lad to the rescue! Superman he ain’t, but we suppose he gets the job done.
2: Danny The Street
Danny the Street’s name is not a metaphor. This is a comic about Danny, whose super power… is being an actual street.
That’s right, we’re talking actual pavement capable of sentient thought. We suppose this makes Danny the Street a super hero, but it’s a concept so hard to wrap your mind around that we can’t even find ways to make fun of it. It’s uncertain if Danny The Street is a sign of overflowing creative genius or creative bankruptcy.
1: Anything And Everything Involving Eye-Scream
Eye-Scream is a mutant in the X-Men universe who can turn into ice cream.
Any flavor of ice cream, including banana split.
With a super power like this, Eye-Scream takes the only appropriate course of action and tries to destroy the X-Men.
That’s it, game over. Let’s all scream for Eye-Scream, because he takes the cake for the most bizarre comic book character ever written. We’re out.
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